Be Unique!

 "We wonder, What am I to do with my life? What is my purpose here? Does God have a calling on my life? God answers these questions through our natural gifts and abilities. He leads us to our purpose through the natural skills and unique talents He bestows upon us. God-given gifts are the skills a person easily performs without formal training. We derive great pleasure from doing what we are naturally good at doing.

If you aren't sure of your purpose just do what you do well, and then watch God confirm you by blessing your endeavors. Don't spend your life trying to do what you are not gifted to do. God keeps our world in balance by giving each of us natural talent and pleasure in doing what needs to be done for the good of everyone around us.

We know we are operating in our gifts and calling when what we do ministers LIFE to others. If what we do makes us miserable and fills us with a sense of dread, it's possible we are not in God's perfect will. God gives us peace and joy to let us know we are fulfilling His perfect plan.

I encourage you to look at what you enjoy, what you're good at, what God is giving you grace to do-and then let God be God in your life. He wants to flow through you in many different ways, but it may not be the same way He flows through others. Trust His ability in and through you, and don't be afraid to be UNIQUE".

Ask Ruby!

God's Best Gifts

Blessed are they who have the gift of making friends, for it is one of God's best gifts.

Celebrating Black History Month

1. In March 2008, the United Nation’s Committee on the Elimination of Racial Discrimination condemned what it found to be racial disparities in the death penalty and in the sentencing of youth to life without parole for crimes committed when they were under 18, a practice the committee wants stopped. The committee called on authorities to take steps, including a freeze on the death penalty, to root out racial bias.
2. A 2007 Yale University of Law study revealed that African-American defendants receive death penalty at three times the rate of white defendants in cases where the victims are white. In addition, killers of white victims are treated more severely than people who kill minorities, when it comes to deciding what charges to bring.
3. Since 1977, the overwhelming majority of death row defendants have been executed for killing white victims, although African-Americans make up about half of all homicide victims. African Americans account for one in three people executed since 1977.
4. The U.S. “war on drugs” disproportionately targets urban minority neighborhoods. Two national reports released in early 2008 found that although whites commit more drug offenses, African Americans are arrested and imprisoned on drug charges at much higher rates.
5. The increase in the annual number of black arrests was greater than in the annual number of white arrests: black drug arrests were 4.8 times greater in 2007 than in 1980.
6. The Human Rights Watch discovered that across 34 states studied, most drug offenders are white, yet a black man is 11.8 times more likely than a white man to be sent to prison on drug charges, and a black woman is 4.8 times more likely than a white woman.
7. Studies of discrimination in housing markets reveal that African American or Latino/a testers experience some form of differential treatment roughly half of the time. Even the most conservative measures reveal that at least 25% of the time there will be discrimination in many important types of behavior by rental or real estate agents.

Exercise and eat good food to improve our over all health

Need Advice?

Life’s Interruptions

As we are going about our business and something new, unplanned, many times unpleasant, comes and takes us off the planned course were on, or are on – Life’s Interruptions.

What do I do when life throws me a curveball?

What do I do when things don’t go as I have planned?

--Life’s Interruptions

Ask Ruby  

Exercise and eat good food to improve our over all health. 

Dear Ruby:

Please explain to my wife and me why exercise is essential, and the benefits of eating good food as we enter midlife. I continue to tell her that we need to sustain our regular exercise routines and eat wholesome food now that we are both becoming less activity since our early retirements.    

--Ed in East Orange, NJ

Dear Ed:

Exercise is as important to a healthy body as is good food. Preventing symptoms and the associated problems of aging involves more than what we do or do not eat.  To be well prepared for midlife, we must engage in some form of physical exercise.  “Virtually all the evidence we have points in the same direction.   “Exercise makes us healthier and may impact longevity.  It is worthwhile to become more aggressive in using exercise to improve overall health.”  I must add, if we want strong bones to support our frame and firm muscles to protect our internal organs when we reach 50 (midlife) we should start our program early in life and maintain and sustain our exercise through out our life.  But, it is never too late to benefit from exercise; quite the contrary, with conditioning, we can have stronger muscles at 50 (midlife) than we did at 25. Remember, optimum results come from planned preparation, not last minute desperation. Consider the following list:

Benefits of Sustained, Regular Exercise

·        Improves circulation, reduces fatigue, creates energy, and increases our capacity for handling stress.

·        Exercise is a practical way to treat every day stress. It can reduce depression and give us a feeling of well-being.

·        Regular exercise can prolong life.

·        For each hour of physical activity, we can expect to live that hour over, and live one or more to boot.

·        Physical activity stimulates digestion and increases the absorption of nutrients.

·        Exercise helps you sleep soundly.

·        This one is for your wife: Studies show that active women have appreciably more vitamin C and iron in their bloodstreams than   sedentary women.

·        Another one for your wife:  For women, exercise can bring the hormones to a normal level, greatly reducing hot flashes.

·        The last one for your wife:  Exercise helps the adrenal glands to balance female hormones, such as, estrogen, during and  after menopause, allowing for a smoother transition.

·        Exercise is vital to weight control:  it diminishes the appetite, burns calories, build muscle, and speeds up body metabolism.

Your wife and you should make sure that what you choose is something you want to pursue and can easily incorporate into your lives.

Note: we can not eat the same amount of calories as we get older and maintain our same weight.  In other to keep the same weight we must ingest fewer calories, become more physically active, or both to derive permanent benefits, also we must continue a regular exercise program for the rest of your lives.

Dr.  Ruby Mae Chapman, Napolean & Ada Moton Chapman Institute, Life Coach     

The Wisdom of Sharing

As I sat in Morocco, among the Berber People and listened!
One day long ago a Sufi Master was near death, and wanted to make sure his three disciples would come under the guidance of another Sufi Master after he passed away.  He had accumulated 17 camels during his life, so he laid down the following instructions for his disciples:

“On my death, the three of you shall divide my 17 camels in the following proportions: the eldest disciple shall have half of them, the middle in age disciple shall have one-third, and the youngest shall have one-ninth.” 

He died soon after writing this bequest, leaving the disciples in a dilemma, so they sought out advice from learned men for how to interpret these instructions.  Someone told them just to make the nearest possible division, while another told them to own the camels communally until they reproduced.  A clever trader said they should just sell the camels and divide the proceeds among themselves, and a wizened old judge advised them that the bequest was null and void because it couldn’t be executed.

The three disciples weren’t happy with any of these suggestions, sensing that their master must have had some deeper and more helpful lesson in mind for them.  But what exactly was that lesson?

Lesson 1: Remain Open-Minded

One obvious lesson the disciples learned from their master’s instructions was that seeking advice and wisdom from others will always broaden their perspectives.  No one ever has a monopoly on the truth, no matter how quick or smart they are.  Genuine wisdom requires humility in the face of life’s many complexities, so a wise person not only knows how to tolerate and learn from different points of view but actually seeks them out.

This is as true in life.  Very few decisions ever involve Absolute Truth.  A decision almost always boils down to a matter of opinion.  Not only that, but the actual outcome of any decision will have just as much to do with the random and unforeseen events that surround it as with the intellectual prowess of the decision-maker, so always be prepared for the unexpected. 

Something else the disciples learned was patience.  Their dilemma was significant, and they certainly wanted to resolve it, but there was no urgency to the issue.  And for today, learning how to be patient is perhaps more important than ever before, given the fast pace of life and the proliferation of information and techology.  Every time your mind is refreshed it produces a new batch of issues commanding your immediate attention.  Figuring out not just how to prioritize, but how to “let go” of the unimportant issues while showing patience for the truly important ones is a skill that will always comes in handy for most bottom-line obsessed, goal-oriented, time-stressed up-and-comers today.

The Dilemma Resolved

In the end, our three disciples did find the answer to their Master’s challenge.  After much searching, a wise old man solved the riddle for them:

“Although I only have one camel myself, I will lend it to you so you now have 18.  The eldest disciple should then be given one-half of these, which is 9. The middle disciple should get one-third, or 6, and the youngest disciple should get one-ninth, or 2.  That will leave just one camel, which is mine, and you can return it to me.”

This was how the three disciples found their new Sufi Master.  It also taught them one final lesson.

Lesson 3: Share

Sharing with others is a natural human urge, and it is becoming an increasingly vital idea as the cost of interacting continues to plummet. The urge to share comes largely from the human instinct for empathy, and  empathy and trust are becoming ever more important to people as we become more and more technologically connected.  It is the human instinct for sharing that drives our willingness to create  So think carefully about how your own  family’ and your friends’urge for you  share might be used to benefit your life in the e-social age.  How can you do a better job empathizing with your family and friends?  

Sharing comes from empathy, and for a family/friend,empathy is the ultimate form of love and insight.   

Ancient lessons can often be very useful even in modern situations.  Technology may gallop along, but wisdom is timeless.   

I Just Returned from Morocco

I Just returned from Morocco

Morocco is an exotic gateway to Africa; its mountains, desert and coast are populated by Berbers and nomads, and its ancient medina lanes lead to souqs and riads. The Mountains & Desert, from Saharan dunes to the peaks of the High Atlas, Morocco could have been tailor- made for travelers. Lyrical landscapes carpet this sublime slice of North Africa like the richly colored and patterned rugs we lusted after in local cooperatives. The mountains – not just the famous High Atlas but also the Rif and suntanned ranges leading to Saharan oases – offered simple, breathtaking pleasures: night skies glistening in the thin air; views over a fluffy cloudbank from the Tizi n’Test pass. On lower ground, there are rugged coastlines, waterfalls and caves in forested hills, and the mighty desert. The Traditional Life in varies terrain may transform your dreams, but it shapes the very lives of Morocco’s Berbers, Arabs and Saharawis. Despite encroaching modernity, with motorways joining mosques and kasbahs as manmade features of the landscape, Moroccan people remain closely connected to the environment. The nomadic southern ‘blue men’ brave the desert’s burning expanses in robes and turbans, with mobile phones in hand. Likewise, traditional life continues – with tweaks – in the techniques of Berber carpet makers; in date cooperatives; in medina spice trading; and in the lifestyles in ports. Ancient Medinas, often exotic, sometimes overwhelming and always unexpected, these ancient centers are bursting with Maghrebi mystique and madness: the perfect complement to the serene countryside. When you hit town and join the crowds, you follow a fine tradition of nomads and traders stretching back centuries. Walking through     Fès, the world’s largest living medieval Islamic city, and the carnivalesque in Marrakesh. was breathtaking. Moroccan Activities for us included: Meeting the Moroccan people.  Drinking mint tea; watching the world go by with the locals; hiking up North Africa’s highest peak, riding across the Sahara Desert in Jeeps, camel trekking, shopping in the worlds 5^th largest shopping mall, getting lost in the medina, and sweating in the hammam. Between these activities, you can sleep in the famous hotels rooms, relax on panoramic terraces and eat a Rick’s Café in Casablanca.

Get going!

Once you hit 90, your average life expectancy is 95!

If you intend to live forever (well, nearly), the key is to live healthfully now. Here are the top 10 steps to reaching 90 in good health and great shape:

1. Stay active. That daily 30-minute walk is vital to keeping you young.

Get enough of these to keep body and brain humming: whole grains, fruits, and veggies; vitamin D3 (1,000 IU; 1,200 after age 60); DHA omega-3s (600-900 mg); low-dose aspirin (talk to your doc first).

Get next to none of these: saturated fats, trans fats, added sugars.

Sleep 7 1/2 hours to 8 hours a night. Every night.

Manage stress. Meditate (here's an easy way) or take two 10- or 15-minute deep-breathing breaks daily.

Do. Not. Smoke.

Stimulate your brain. Do puzzles, learn languages, and take on new challenges. Stay sharp with these nifty (and fun) brain games.

Support "village" movements: neighbors-helping-neighbors programs that let people live independently at home.

Harass your legislators to get health costs under control and affordable. At some point, you'll need it. Meanwhile, here are 6 ways to cut your own healthcare costs.

Move to North Dakota, Hawaii, or California. They're meccas for 90-year-olds.

Then plan on blowing out more than 90 candles. Once you hit 90, your average life expectancy is 95!